I’ve now had two babies so that means I’m an expert. Just kidding of course, but I do have some advice that I can’t help but pass on after realizing my biggest regret from my pregnancies which is that I didn’t take enough pictures. I literally took more pictures of my cats than of myself during my pregnancies. So my advice is simple – take the pictures, take all of the pictures. And while I’m busy being bossy, make like Meghan Markle and put your hand over that belly. It took me months to do that in pictures, I felt so weird about it, but cradle that bump- soak it all in. One of my favorite things every about being pregnant is feeling that sweet baby right there with you. Plus, in my opinion it looks better – a little nestle of the hand on the bump can take you from “did she just eat a big lunch” to “wow, she is resplendent in her motherly glow”.
Take Maternity Pictures
This is going to sound like such a grouchy thing to say, but before I was actually pregnant I had an aversion to maternity photos. I will even go so far as to admit I have a weird reaction to the word “maternity”- it isn’t my favorite term associated with the miracle of life. Maybe you differ here and had maternity pictures booked the minute those two pink lines popped up. Or maybe you also feel weird about them and can’t put your finger on why. If you fall into the second category, I strongly encourage you to get over it and book a “maternity shoot”. Call it a family shoot, a lifestyle session – I don’t care what you need to call it, but just do it.
Katie Beyer Photography
While pregnant with Margaret, I realized my regret at the end of my pregnancy and it was too close to my due date to get on the books with the photographer I wanted and before we could ask a friend to take some for us, I was surprised with an early induction. But when I was pregnant with Catherine there was no doubt in my mind that we’d do a family shoot at the end of my pregnancy and I am so glad we did. Since we had just moved back to Florida, we decided to take the photos on the beach near us to reflect this new coastal chapter in our life. I’d say once you’ve decided to do the maternity shoot, find a destination that is special to you and your family. For us that often is right at home!
Take “Bumpdate” Pictures
My regrets go beyond missing out on a formal maternity photo shoot, they also include not taking any “bumpdate” photos. You know the kind – selfie-style, turned to the side, to document the progression of your “bump”. This is the easiest thing to adopt right now. If you’re pregnant and reading this, or may be expecting soon – trust me, you won’t regret taking “bumpdate pictures”, but you may regret not taking them. That is where I fall – I didn’t do them, because I felt self-conscious and I can’t tell you how much I regret it. Like many, I’ve had a complicated relationship with my body and pregnancy was no exception. On the one hand I marveled at the wonder of it all and felt more at home in my skin than ever before. On the other hand, things changed and stretched and I wasn’t exactly jumping for camera time especially when I already felt weird about maternity photos in general. You don’t have to do anything with these pictures. I mean if you feel like it, share it from the rooftops with the corresponding fruit size along with the fact that you’re craving turkey drizzled in chocolate. But really – you don’t have to share them. You don’t even have to tell anyone you’re doing them. It can be 100% private. However you integrate this advice into your pregnancy routine is up to you, but as your friend I say just do it.
Take Newborn Pictures.
Katie Beyer Photography
While I didn’t make it in time to get maternity pictures when I was pregnant with Margaret, thanks to my last minute change of heart, I at least learned I needed to get newborn pictures scheduled right away and that most photographers recommend doing them between the first 5-10 days of life which sounded certifiably nuts to me but I went for it, I am so glad we did. Once in labor with Margaret, I let our photographer know, I ordered some monogram bloomers off of Etsy with the initials I was pretty sure we were going to go with, and committed to getting showered and dressed for a newborn session 7 days postpartum. My feet were so puffy they would not fit into real shoes and I can’t even talk about the rest of my body. But I pulled myself together and made it happen.
I don’t know what I thought about all the precious newborn pictures I had seen before, but it just hadn’t clicked that we were talking about such a quick turnaround from hospital to photo session. Thank goodness for that revelation because we committed to her right away and we were able take pictures with brand new baby Margaret. There are a few ways to accomplish the newborn photos – some choose to do them while literally in the hospital and I learned recently these are called the “Fresh 48”, as in taken during the first 48 hours of life. There are a ton of sweet inspiration galleries on Pinterest or with a quick Google search. I don’t think that a formal “Fresh 48” session would have been a fit for me and part of that may be due to the circumstances around my induction and delivery – I mean at 24 hours after delivery, I was still on a magnesium drip. But I think most people have a lot to deal with immediately after giving birth. If you feel drawn to the Fresh 48 approach either in place of a session at home or in addition to it, then I’d reach out to someone who has done it to learn a little more about it to see how to prepare and what to expect.
We did our newborn shoot at home about 7 days afterward with both girls and while it is a lot to pull together and look (at least) showered that soon after labor and delivery, I found it manageable and worth it. T
Katie Beyer Photography
Keep Taking Pictures
After it’s all over – you’ve taken the bumpdates, you have special maternity and newborn family photos and are now watching your little one grow as fast as everyone says they will, you need to KEEP TAKING PICTURES! Yet another weird hangup I had – I used to see professional looking photos of friends, and friends of friends and their children and think, “are they just constantly getting their pictures taken?” But now I am one of those people – I can’t get enough and frequently tell Curtis that professional family pictures are at the top of my gift list. Do I stress about my hair, our outfits, etc … ? Yes – definitely – that didn’t go away. But I got to a point where I know the feeling of regret over not having pictures I’ll forever wish I had is worse than the temporary stress of figuring out what to wear.
Caroline Jurgenson Photography
To help with your newfound commitment to keep taking pictures, my friend Sarah Tucker introduced me to Flytographer, a site that connects you to local photographers in popular vacation destinations so if you’re lucky enough to visit a spot like Montreal or Seattle for example and you want a souvenir you’ll forever cherish, this is the resource for you. And if you can’t book a professional then do what I often do, which is muster up some courage and confidently ask a stranger to take a picture of all four of us. 99% of the time they’re thrilled to do it and most often I find they’re eager to have the favor returned!
Take Pictures Even When It’s Hard
I started jotting these thoughts down a few days ago when Timehop reminded me that this time last year we were finally able to get out to the beach to start taking our maternity pictures after rescheduling many times due to summer storms as well as my increasingly difficult gestational hypertension. At 32 weeks my blood pressure started getting high and I was put on additional monitoring each week at the hospital to watch out for an escalation into pre-eclampsia. Toward the end of my pregnancy, I was more consistently feeling the worst of the hypertensive symptoms, not to mention I was still vomiting daily, and our photographer was so patient with me until we finally got our shoot. My gestational hypertension eventually did turn into severe pre-eclampsia and I was admitted for induction at 37 weeks, not too long after getting our professional family photos. I am so glad I have those but my pregnancies with both girls was so much more complicated than any of the pretty pictures tell and while I have a few little snaps and videos that look deeper, I wish I’d gotten more.
I was fortunate for many reasons the least of which being that we were able to have a family photo session. I was relieved that I made it so far in my pregnancy before my complications reared their head. I am thankful that my health care providers were diligent and responsive so my labor and delivery was as uncomplicated as I think it could have possibly been. And I am grateful that Catherine arrived hearty and healthy and ready to go home. Not everyone is as lucky as I was and their path is filled with challenges many of us will never be able to comprehend. What better time than NICU Awareness Month to tell you about a friend of mine who delivered her son at 23 weeks due to HELLP syndrome. After recovering from the life-threatening pregnancy complication, c-section, and premature delivery of her son, their sweet baby boy spent 148 days in the NICU before finally coming home. Thanks to Facebook, friends from near and far could cheer on this feisty and resilient little one. I’ll never forget that to celebrate his 1st birthday, they coordinated donations to update the cameras and other equipment for the NICU nursing staff. After their time in the NICU they learned just how much a picture means. Members of the nursing team regularly took pictures for NICU families and made scrapbook pages for holidays and other milestones. Now through a foundation’s commitment, the NICU where their son was will have funding for the photography and memory page plus so much more for the next three years. To learn about more about the NICU, check out this page of the University of Iowa’s Stead Family Children’s Hospital. Some more food for thought on this topic, I remember reading DoSayGive’s gender-reveal post during her hospital bed rest with her 4th daughter and noting she had precious photos taken to capture these memories despite it occurring during what was a time of stress and uncertainty.
Pregnancy doesn’t look the same for everyone and complicated or not it can be difficult to wrap your mind around remembering to take pictures or finding the motivation to do so. But hear me when I say if I could turn back time and change one thing this would be it – take the picture. However it happens, however you do it, you’ll be glad you did.
